I know that this is a site dedicated to birth, in particular, Free Birth… However, I believe that everything is connected and what I have learned about birth, I have learned about life.
The other night I went to gather with women at our monthly Women’s Circle. The evening was all about sex, sacred sexuality was the topic… and this is what came through me after the event so I want to talk about it.
I am a mother of three children, in a partnership of 12 years (constantly evolving and stretching the boundaries of this relationship), and I am a sexual human who has been terrified to claim this power fully. However, I know that by choosing to keep my sexual energy at bay, locked away because of shame and lack of trust, that I am missing out on the pulse of the universal lifeforce – the ecstasy that is constantly available and flowing and uniting.
Lately I have been known to say that everything is sexual, sacred, and sensual. The three S’s. A stimulating conversation, a tantalizing diner with friends, a powerful yoga session, a good F@#$, a bubble bath, the trance of dance, listening to music, breastfeeding, giving birth, writing, you name it, it is sexual. Ahhh, what a crazy notion that when you are present in the moment of life, when you are merging with all that is, when you are love and loving, and when you are in connection – you are experiencing your sexual life force, you are One.
So tell me, since many are ashamed of this energy, this sensation, this pulse and since we have been shamed, wounded, and now guarded, how are we supposed to heal ourselves, others, and the planet? Does it not make sense that we have a fucked up culture because we are terrified of claiming this natural essence, we lack trust in ourselves and others, and we are wrong or bad for actually being ecstatic with life while in the presence of others. When we do this, we turn our sexual nature into our shadow and it sneaks out the back door and we all know what that looks like? I am pissed off at our current cultural trends of trying to make everything sexy – just look at media – and yet, we send the message out to the young and old, that you are not allowed nor encouraged to act on those urges!
Ok, here is a thought… We can’t heal the earth if we can’t even treat our own earthly bodies with love and respect. If we can’t honor the sexuality and sensuality of our own body and if we are ashamed of it, than of course we are going to continue to rape the great Mother Earth, of course we are not going to allow ourselves to feel the eros of the planet – the love force. If we did, what do you think would happen? Well we might actually make different choices, we would treat the Mother Earth like our Lover – with deep respect, regard, affection, attention, care, and Love. What a concept!
But then again, what do I know. I am only tapping into this great force, this need to respect and honor this brilliant energy that provides the Self and the Cosmos and the Other with great pleasure. Deconstructing years of cultural imprinting that states, be sexual and sexy but don’t LIKE IT. Especially as a mother, a wife, a partner, a lover etc. And if you do like it and want to tap into that energy well, it is dark, dangerous, scary, and dirty (and even if it is, that there is nothing wrong with that also). Time to lift the veil and start reclaiming ourselves as a whole sexual expression of a human that we are. With that comes great honor and responsibility to use this power wisely.
I believe that if we are taught to honor this sexual life force, we will honor the other. In honor we cannot wound. We cannot misuse. When we are taught to use this power wisely and with consciousness, we seek different choices. We see ecstasy, instead of pain. We see love and nurture instead of disrespect and abuse. We see healing instead of wounding. We see passion and creativity and change, instead of depression, lack of empathy, and lethargy. We see a dance, a human dance, that embraces the essence of life in gratitude to experience being Human.
And so it is…